About Me
Why I Do This Work: My Journey to Empowerment
I grew up in the 1970s — a time when being a “good girl” was praised above all else. I was taught to be polite, agreeable, smile nicely, speak when spoken to, and never rock the boat. Like so many girls of that time, I learned early on that my worth came from keeping others happy.
Nobody around me really talked about their feelings - people just got on with life. Ambition wasn’t something we were encouraged to have, especially not as girls. The message was clear: stay safe, don’t stand out, follow the expected path. Go to school, get a secure job, live nearby, and don’t take risks.
On top of that, I was painfully shy. I’d go bright red at the thought of speaking up - and not just a cute little blush, but a full-on, chest-to-face flush! I dreaded being called on in class, not because I didn’t know the answer, but because I hated being seen.
And so, like many women, I grew up feeling unseen, unheard, and unsure if I was even allowed to have a voice - let alone an opinion.
Still, something in me yearned for more.
When it came time to choose a university, it would have been easy to stay close to home and follow the safe route. But I took a leap - I moved to England to study nursing, with nothing but a duffel bag, a little nervous energy, and a lot of curiosity. It was my first time on a plane and only my second time on a train! That bold move changed everything.
Nursing taught me to connect with people from all walks of life. I made new friends, pushed out of my comfort zone, and slowly built a quiet kind of confidence. But inside, I still struggled with speaking up, especially when it meant being vulnerable.
Where my boundaries were most absent, though, was in romantic relationships.
For years, I chose partners not because they truly saw or respected me, but simply because they liked me - and that felt safe. I didn’t ask myself if I actually liked them back. I didn’t believe my needs or voice mattered. And if someone did try to really get to know me, I ran - it felt too uncomfortable, too unfamiliar.
Over time, this led me into toxic, emotionally unsafe relationships. I ignored the red flags. I told myself I could fix things. But behind closed doors, I was walking on eggshells, constantly questioning myself, being gaslit and emotionally worn down. And slowly, I disappeared - from my friends, from my joy, from myself.
Eventually, I found the courage to leave.
What followed was a deep, soul-searching journey of healing. I devoured every self-help book I could find, listened to podcasts, journaled, explored spiritual practices, and immersed myself in the psychology of relationships and self-worth. The deeper I went, the more clarity I found - especially around my own patterns. I realised I’d never been taught how to honour my needs or set boundaries. I hadn’t been broken - I’d been conditioned.
And the more I healed, the more I noticed how many other women were walking the same path - tired, burnt out, and carrying the emotional weight of everyone else. I found myself supporting them naturally, listening deeply, and offering gentle guidance.
Then I discovered life coaching - and something clicked.
It felt like everything I’d experienced had led me to this. Coaching gave me the tools to help other women in a more powerful, structured way. And in the process of training, I uncovered even more about myself - my beliefs, my fears, my resilience. I even received coaching myself, and some of those sessions were nothing short of life-changing.
Today, I’m still on the journey - and always will be. I’m learning to honour my needs, speak up, set healthy boundaries, and trust myself. I still have moments where I fall into old habits (I’m human, after all!), but now I have the awareness to catch myself, breathe, and choose differently.
I know how painful it is to feel like you’ve lost yourself - to question your worth, silence your voice, and put everyone else first.
And I also know how powerful it is to come home to yourself - to stop apologising, to stop people-pleasing, and to finally say: I matter.
That’s why I do this work.
If you’re ready to rediscover your voice, set boundaries that feel good, and create a life that actually honours you - I’d love to walk alongside you.
Let’s talk. And let’s see what becomes possible when you stop waiting for permission to be yourself.